Fighting Back a Hellish Heat

There’s nothing worse than having a church full of hot people. They start waving their fans harder than ever before, and each minute that the minister is preaching his sermon slows down. It’s like baking inside of an oven. This happened in the middle of a sermon one day and I was so hot that I had to take off my jacket. It was a good thing I wore a shirt underneath my dress shirt, or I would have had sweat stains in my arm pits. I told the minister about a company that does HVAC maintenance in NYC after the church sermon was over. He was glad that I told him, because he wanted to find someone that could fix the air conditioner for a decent price.

The air conditioner in the church had been having problems for months, but miraculously it would always stay on during church service. The only time it would ever stop working is during the church’s off hours when barely anyone was there. During these times, the problem isn’t as bad because there aren’t enough people in the room to generate body heat. Even when the church choir is there for practice, they’re still able to work without getting too hot.

The company was able to fix the air conditioner and the next sermon it was running at full blast. I think someone cranked the thermostat down too low that day, because I was starting to have chills. I guess it’s better that way than to sweat like you’re in the pits of hell while wearing 100 wool sweaters. The minister told everyone that I recommended him the company that fixed the air conditioner and they all thanked me. I was hoping they would let me slide on the collection plate for that week, because my funds were a little tight.

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